Financially Savvy Squirrels Gifts

'You've been approved for your loan, Mr. Root. We'd like to hold your nuts as collateral.'

Squirrel putting nuts in a safe box.

'Don finally figured out a way to keep the squirrels from getting at the bird feeder.'

Saving for Retirement.

'Our tabby was pre-approved for a credit card!'

A Man and His Cat Read the Financial News.

"All right, Thompson. The board concedes that this quarter's economic growth does look very much like a kitty.

Maybe it's time to stop giving our bones to a broker and start burying them in the backyard again.

'So much for the will! Now, before you start celebrating, I suggest you think about inheritance taxes, because, according to my calculations, you will be left with. . ."

'This is the 'I Fell Behind On My Credit Card Payments, So They Took My Guitar Away Blues'. I'll be performing it a cappella.'

'Oh my God, dog biscuits are down!'

'I couldn't keep squirrels away from my bird feeders, so I called a lawyer!'

'It's a good living. They train you to do default swaps and you get paid in seals.'

'You should see the bird feeder I built. It's 100% squirrel proof.'

"Betty, we're paying through the nose for that plastic surgery! Just look at that visa and discovery bill!"

"Good boy."

"Must you do that every time I say interest rates are bound to rise?"

"My tactic is to feed the squirrels so much they're too fat to climb the bird feeder."

'...anything else, sir?'

'I actually make a lot more money as a bookmaker than I ever did as a race horse...'

Investments: We have organic and gluten-free stocks.

Dog has a hi-yeild inbox full of bones.

Dog dreaming about how to catapult a squirrel.

'Acme investments, featuring: Catnip stocks, catnip futures...'

'Me, I've stopped storing food for winter: I order my meals online and they're delivered straight to my door'

'I'm tired of begging, so I'm applying for a loan.'

'You're very cute but your account is overdrawn - Ok, what the heck...?

Another failed attempt to keep squirrels out of bird feeders: The Great Wall of China.

"She's in a borrowed dress and I'm in a rented tux...throw money!"

"You don't have to do the mic drop move every time you chase a squirrel up a tree."

'Walter doesn't trust banks.'

'Cats are very independent.'