Financial Thriller Enthusiast Gifts

'First of all, I need you to phone around, reassure the investors.'

'Good news! Some guy stole my identity online. Now he's saddled with my bad credit rating.'

Convict says: ' I got involved with mortgage fraud ... just as the market started to fall.'

"Let's see what he does when he peers over a real cliff."

The Ekert Saga: 'I just got an image of wall street guys having to deal with real bulls and bears.' - 'Well, yes...that'd be the upside to ahmageddon...'

'Looks like a Ponzi scheme, but you got in early so you should be fine - provided you keep your mouth shut.'

"Did you hear that that bastard McMinney has buggered of to work for Bank of America!"

'Why do you want a career in the bank?'

'Like it? I LOVED it! The narrative gripped me from the first sentence and didn't let go until the final, heart-stopping page! And the CHARACTERS! Without question, Harris, this is the finest year-end financial report you've ever written!'

'Would you do me the honour of becoming tax advantaged with me?'

'Now that we've moved to Hawaii, I can start trading at 3:30 a.m.--Isn't that great?'

Woman uses an ATM with buttons for: Grocery, Leverage Buyout, Start Up Capital, Shop Till You Drop.

"Nothing is illegal if a hundred businessmen decide to do it."

'Instead of jail time, our head of finance chose the stock option.'

'This morning a rumor that we would buy the Arpex Corp drove our stock up $3. Around noon a rumor that Arpex would buy us drove it up another $3. And in the afternoon a rumor that wo have nothing to do with Arpex drove it up $3 more.'

The Bullish World

'No, your stock didn't split. The fact it's worth half of what it was yesterday is just an amazing coincidence.'

Greece - The Black Hole

Yes we can increase your overdraft, but I'd like to see a little more grovelling, please.

"Will the current economic trend end in a whimper or a bang? For answers, let's turn to tonight's guests!"

The Apprentice: Recession Special.

Man with a Plan

'Your in great shape...'

"junior, I'll explain 'taxation' to you, if you explain 'crowdfunding' to me."

'Yeah. It was a good day.'

No future for the dollar.

What's a CEO's motivation?

'If you kiss me, I'll cause the Dow Jones Industrial Average to soar, manufacturing and trade data to re-accelerate, and housing to rebound significantly throughout the remainder of this and the next quarter.'

'Make sure he doesn't turn his TV to any business news programs while he's here.'

"You can afford to retire at 65, but you'll need to die at 70."

"I take it your credit score has gone up?"

'The acting was awful and the plot was thin, but the mortgage rate looked interesting.'

'Have you been reading the financial pages again?'

S.S, Eurozone in Mayday call

Explaining corporate restructuring to shareholders.