Financial Planning Fan Gifts

'Our short-term solution is money. Our long-term solution is more money.'

Line one is my fixed income, line two is my fixes expenses, and the difference is the fix I'm in.

'I've come home on time, and within a revised budget.'

Help. If I hadn't lost everything, I'll tell you what stocks I'd buy now.

'Andy, this is Doug. Looks like we're going to have to dip into the reserves earlier than we expected.'

'I know you can't win them all, but just once I wish I could scrape together the entry fee!'

"My astrologer said my pension was fine but I just thought I'd get a second opinion."

"No, we're going to see a financial advisor, we can't be flippant about our retirement money."

'What I don't understand is how all three of us managed to get the figures wrong!'

"The Net National Product rose slightly last month."

"Forget five-year plans. Let's just figure out how to make it to lunch."

The day the stock market went UP.

Golly, �1m a year isn't too much. I don't know why your shareholders don't understand you.

"I’ve combined all your outstanding debt into what we here in the banking business like to call a honkin’ big loan."

'Please remember that these figures could be off as much as two dollars.'

'The prevailing wisdom is that markets are always right. I think that luck is always right.'

'It has come to my attention that we need to hedge against our five-year plan.'

"Gentlemen, I'm pleased to say the firm is perfectly positioned to avoid chapter eleven and still be in existence this time next year."

'It's rather unorthodox, but it appears the deposit refund on the empties will cover your first interest payment.'

"Work hard. Save money. Work hard. Save money. Work hard. Save money. Work hard. Save money. Yay!!! I died rich!"

'We're finding out that those 'wrongs' we made 'right' were actually right after all.'

"We need to reset our fiscal compass to the changing business horizon."

"I'm from brokers without borders. Invest in deserted island reits!"

"Some day, son, all this will be your ex-wife's."

Bank Loan Dept. Personal Business. Uh-oh, some loans have gone bad! A tennis pro defaulted and a novelist is in Chapter 7. The bed linens company folded and the scuba school went under! Are any of our loans still good? Yeah, the music streaming service is totally sound! And ironically, the lighting company is in the black!

"We were able to retire 6 years early by canceling cable & eliminating anything fun."

"If I made as much as him, I could retire in a couple of days"

LEMONADE 50 CENTS, 'I'm only seven years old -- I don't HAVE a credit rating yet!'

Watering Money

"Cash, Jordan. That's what separates man from the apes."

'Dammit - how do we get in on that gross national product?'

I'm not making enough money to like you.

'If only I'd spent as much time on my investment portfolio as I did on my lolly mix when I was a kid.'

"I made money the old fashioned way. I inherited it."

"I'd like to thank my parents and my creditors for making this possible."