Financial Foresight Gifts

I've done all I can do, so I'm referring you to a specialist in financial planning.

Bank: For Every New Account Get A Shiny New Quarter!

"Don't be silly - of course I'm worried about exposure. I'm over-extended in the bond markets, and interest rates are heating up, the Dow is about to boil over. . ."

"People are looking for stability in pension arrangements..."

"We're always excited to hear from analysts who are bullish on the market."

"To say things are bad is an UNDERSTATEMENT...We're staring into a FINANCIAL ABYSS, the COLLAPSE of the banking sector...On the other hand some experts believe that things will be back to normal in a few months ."

The End of Trump?

Passing the Pension Time Bomb

"What's Tim doing on the window ledge?"

'I hear the market went on quite a roller coaster ride today.'

'Son, someday you're going to be short all of this.'

"Give it to me straight, doc. Will I outlive social security and medicare?"

'You're better off without him.'

"Come climate change, you could find yourself sitting beach-front on the French riviera."

Stock market Bull & Bear financial whirlwind.

'Waiter, there's going to be a fly in my soup!'

'Enough about your losing portfolio. Let me tell you about my vacation home in the Hamptons...'

'That's not in addition to your pension, that IS your pension.'

"I don't know about you, but I thought we'd be fully vested by the time we reached 4th grade."

Bush short-term energy policy.

'Give it to me straight, Doc, what are the chances of a recession?'

"I see a wild celebration...I see music, dancing, much food and revelry! . . . I see - oops!! Sorry....wrong party."

"If you hadn't lost everything, I would recommend that you buy now."

'Financial services at your service - I recommend transferring your money to me - no fee.'

'Those growth funds you sold me didn't work.'

"Everything's going great except, you know, everything."

'No one is buying our plummeting shares at the stock market, so Pumroy found a way to sell our toxic assets on Ebay.'

Bank manager with no business has tumbleweed blowing into office.

'It's the bank's Small Business Advisor to see you, dear.'

"Carl has decided that, with the economy being the way it is, he's going to be a stay at home son."

'You will meet a tall dark stranger and you will beat him 6-4, 6-3, 6-0!'

Why College Costs So Much 101.

"Let me first say that up until around ten this morning you had a very impressive portfolio."

'I see a nine and a one. A one-night stand with a nine-month pregnancy.'

"It's never too early to start pension planning."