Fiancé Pillows

"I'll agree to a pre-nup if you'll agree to a non-compete clause."

"That's out of my price range. Do you have anything that's free?"

'Didn't you get my e-mail'

'How worse? Give me the worst-case scenario.'

"I do. Have your people contact my people to hammer out the details."

'Darling, how romantic...a pre-nup.'

Last night of freedom.

'Subject to contract, will you be my wife?'

'Heads I do, tails I'm outta here.'

'...in sickness or health, inflation or deflation,marriage tax credit or debit...'

'We've postponed the wedding until we come up with something we can do at the ceremony that will become a viral video.'

'I reject the terms of the contract!'

'This is the era of transparency. I'm marrying you for your money.'

'Just a doctor! I thought you were a specialist!'

'Past performance is not an indication of future results.'

'Of course it's a real diamond. You think I'd spend eighty bucks for a fake?'

"OK, I took a hike. Now will you marry me?"

Why lawyers should never try to write their own vows.

'I'd like your permission to enter into pre-nuptial negotiations...'

'I hate to rush you, but I'm getting a leg cramp.'

'Do you cater weddings?' Why the groom is never put in charge of anything.

'Bob will be along shortly to marry you. He's looking over a mint-condition, 1965 Mustang that just went on sale.'

"'Better or worse' and 'richer or poorer' are NOT choices."

"I see a girl, I see a marriage, I see her not understanding you, I see a beer belly. Do you want me to go on?"

'Looks like they were really meant for each other.'

"Perhaps if I phrased the question differently."

'Full refund if she comes to her senses within 24 hours.'

"No, we're not Jewish, but we think it would be fun for our reception's theme to be 'A Jewish Wedding.'"

"Damn it, Gareth, we agreed - no ex-girlfriends invited"

"I really need to start wearing clothes this time of year."

"I think we'd make a good team!"

Victoria's pre-marriage questionnaire continues...'Last one, Joe...I promised myself I'd only marry the man who could correctly finish this sentence...The perfect man is...'

Man with lobotomy scar - "Changed my mind."

"Pre-nups are healthy for a relationship. It's good for our lawyers to get to know one another."

"If anyone thinks the bride could do better, speak now or..."