Festive Season Embracer Gifts

'I'll bet my Dad's pants are bigger than yours.'

"Christmas - what a fuss eh?"

"Damn. I think I missed the turn for Bethlehem."

"One more time, Mr Claus - who sold you the data?"

"Oh, we're not religious. We only go on the solstices and equinoxes."

Mrs. Claus has a ladies night out.

Happy Easter

'You and your 'Rescue the Reindeer' campaign!'

"We don't care about his nose. We won't let him play because he's not vaccinated and won't wear a mask!"

"Just because I can deliver toys around the world in one night, doesn't mean I understand the tax code."

"Why would I want to meet Santa? I can just go home and log onto his social media page from the comfort of my bed."

"An early spring was just a prediction- I can't actually control the weather!"

"I prefer to talk to Mrs. Claus. She doesn't care if I'm naughty or nice."

'Do I get to take an 'elfie' with Santa, too?'

The Porkypine Pals Christmas Adventure - Part Five

Glyndebourne

"Well, I have an opening in Cloverdale Mall ... let me hear you say Ho Ho Ho."

"Do you feel your eyes have changed any since your last visit?" "No. They seem to be ho, ho, ho, holding their own."

"Could you help me fit nine days work into five and still see my family?"

Old Joe the gardener was begining to regret the fact he'd bought last year's pumpkin seeds on Halloween!

"Darling, do you remember where I put the insurance policies?"

'Gee, where are all the crowds this year?'

"Spring is definitely here! Which means yard work is not far behind...."

"Will she know what this is in reference to?"

To the office...happy Easter, from Sid.

"We're wasting our time. He gets them free at work."

"Well, what would YOU like for Christmas?"

"We can do it on the net now... so it's off to the knackery for you."

Happy New Ear!

"Will you only promise the children toys that can be brought at this store?"

'Leave the Iranian airspace at once!'

Great Moment in North Pole History

Santa Elevator

'Yes, I think you better had ask Santa for it. Because there's no way I could afford to buy it.'

"Don't even think about it."