Festive-philosophers Gifts

Of all nights...this was not the one to ponder the glass half empty, half full conundrum!!

"Christmas - what a fuss eh?"

"I don't believe in you!"

Help! Have to pay back a big world bank loan.

'No, dear. I don't think the star on the Christmas tree will implode, and suck our living room into a black hole.'

"We'll see how it goes. It's Santa's first year with the genetically modified deer."

Bad gifts

"Just as I feared. Tariffs."

'Naughty? Nice? Santa, I don't deal in absolutes.'

"Who cares what little kids think? What's important is that you believe in yourself."

'I don't believe in myself any more.'

'Due to budget cuts we are having to take on more temporary staff.'

'After talking to him. it's clear our only hope for a bonus this year is Santa Claus.'

"That's Bridgeport from legal, he's got the consent forms."

"This year let's choose a Christmas card design that reflects the situation the country is in. Let's go for a design that says: Bah humbug!"

'No, I'm not writing to Santa, I'm writing a blog questioning the validity of Santa, since he has no web presence.'

There IS a Santa Claus.

"Santa's trying to corner the futures market for coal in anticipation of his visit to Washington."

"It's a party Jim, but not as we know it!"

It was brighter than most, and Biggins allowed himself a quiet smile as he contemplated the immense speeds involved as it burned itself up in the atmosphere...

'So, there really is a Higgs Boson?'

"I never expected to collide into you!"

The composer of the 'Twelve Days of Christmas' song.

'What's all this 'naughty or nice' jazz? ? Haven't you ever heard of situational ethics?'

"I like the Easter Bunny - I find him less judgmental than Santa Claus."

" ... And the kids only like me for my presents."

"Repent, lest the axe of judgement fall upon thee."

"This weekend is seriously messing with some of my previously held beliefs."

Santa Claus Always Delivers

"The year may be over, but it'll be dragged back up on history tests for years to come."

'Year after year I play Santa, and I still don't know how to give.'

"I just keep getting this urge to say 'Bah Humbug'!"

'I don't really believe in Santa Claus anymore, but I don't want to disillusion my parents.'

Xmas Labour Shortage

"I've never hated Christmas, just people."