Feng Shui Expert T-Shirts

'Davinia! Your Feng Shui person's here.'

'Oh my God! Call the Feng Shui expert!'

'Look - a starfish, its manager, its agent, its minders, its significant other, its make-up artist, its personal trainer, its secretary, its astrologer, its feng shui consultant...'

'You've got, like, a Feng Shui problem with your pancreas, dude.'

"Showoff"

...My feng shui would be incompatible with your sumo wrestling.

'Oh, just chuck it in a corner somewhere...'

Japanese woman in minimalist house reads 'How to Clutter Your Life'

'He keeps grounding out the energy flow.'

"Well, your feng shui isn't my feng shui."

'It may not be your feng shui, but it's my feng shui.'

"Don't these fools realize they're violating every principle of feng-shui?"

"You emptied your mind already? That was quick."

"Love your feng shui!"

"That Feng Shui class I took is paying off!"

What your house plant says about you...

'Well Miss Hayward, your suggestion of trying Feng Shui didn't work.'

Visual Gag: Dracula reading a Fang Shui book. The Vampires version of 'Feng' Shui

Frat House Feng Shui

'I want you to sit up front right by my desk. It's not because I want to keep an eye on you. It's a feng shui thing.'

The Feng Shui of the road must be off.

'Eddie, you've tried aggressive growth, multicaps, small caps, blue chips...now maybe it's time to try a support group for underperforming portfolios?'

'It's definitely a tattoo that I can reflect on in the future.'

'To maximize student achievement, the Feng Shui consultant advises one student per classroom.'

"For Feng Shui I'd like to move your liver above your lungs.''

Feng Sushi

'A surgeon operated on the wrong side of the operating room, and is being charged with medical feng shui malpractice.'

'We want to adopt a kid. Do you have a choice our feng shui consultant can look at?'

'How was your luck, dear?'

'I moved the computer and phone off my desk. You wouldn't understand. It's a Feng Shui thing and it has successfully reduced my job related stress.'

"Good afternoon. Feng-shui consultation bureau."

"I'll take this Feng Shui for Cats. And spare me the eye-rolls, please."

Dracula reading fang shui.

"Feng Shwoops!"

"I'll Feng Shui your teeth if you don't stop moving the furniture about."