Feline Tactician T-Shirts

'Now listen: Based on the position of the kennel and the length of the leash, only the shaded part of the garden is dangerous...'

"Stay sharp, wait for my signal and do not, no matter how tempting, pet that cat on the stomach!"

Cat in a tank...

"My hackers just collapsed your country's economy."

'I foresee a few more months of creating havoc without consequences, and then, yes, I see the 'cute' factor will start to wear thin...'

"Let's see now: All dogs have four legs. I have four legs. Therefore, I am a dog."

'So far, sir, we've rejected plans A,B, C, D, E, F, and right now we're evaluating'G'.'

'Now listen: Based on the position of the kennel and the length of the leash, only the shaded part of the garden is dangerous...'

War never felt the same after the Great Puppy Ambush.

"Frankly, I think it's time we take a long hard look at cat futures."

The Use of Cavalry

'Doctor, did you say 5 minutes of traction, or 5 hours?'

'With your permission sir... checkmate.'

So doctor, what you're saying is that all the time I thought she was a crazy cat lady, it was me who had mental health issues...

'This paintball war has really spun out of control.'

Kosovo.

'Who are you and what do you want?'

"I know I told you to fool him into thinking you've got nothing left, but now you've got me convinced."

'Thank you colonel we'll keep your strategy in mind.'

'Do what I did. Tell your mother you want a pet snake. Then she'll get you a dog.'

"I want you to be open and honest and to not leave any hair on the couch."

"Now we have all your arrows!"

Cat boxer

"We can stop the bombardment - the castle surrendered."

Cat Up Tree - "He refuses to come down unless you agree to all his demands."

'Cap'n, why's the enemy fire so accurate after we deployed the smoke screen?'

"What I want to eat? That's easy. Anything you don't have."

'We want the kids to buy it so we can't play up the fact that it's educational in nature.'

'This saves me from having to be in analysis.'

"The play date's breaking up early due to creative differences."

"I don't even like toys. I just do this so people won't talk to me."

How Grandma's cat cleans those hard to reach places.

"Oh no, the dead mouse on the threshold is not an offering! It's retaliation for my dinner being served late the night before..."