Feline Flirt Gifts

Cat Pick Up Lines

'The cats love getting some fresh air, and it's the warmed coat I've ever had.'

Pet Shop: "I think I've found one for me."

Mittens is challenged by the string.

'I foresee a few more months of creating havoc without consequences, and then, yes, I see the 'cute' factor will start to wear thin...'

"The painting and pillows were his idea. The scratches were mine."

"There HAS to be a giant ball at the end of all this string."

'What? I'm scratching the sofa! I'm not! And if I was? It's your fault!'

Flowers? My girl prefers a dead mouse!

'Man it's a tough crowd tonight!'

'We know you have a cat.'

Uses of a Dead Cat in History: Moscow 1917

"Oh, we've got to nip this little trick in the bud right away."

"I'm not kidding: I am feline too and I do love swimming!"

"The narrative seems contrived."

"GPS? In case we get lost? Why would we need that? We're microchipped."

Cat on a psychiatrist's couch: 'Truth is, I'm not really a cat person.'

The ambush.

The universe that has me at the center of it is my kind of universe!

'Cat scans are for felines. I will give your dog a pet scan.'

"Thanks for walking me home."

'Who are you and what do you want?'

'I didn't know people still played footsie.'

Uses of a Dead Cat in History: The Graeae

'Trust me, if you get them as kittens, you learn to love them...'

Great mouser!

'Never underestimate my ability to slink'

'My dog told me to say he likes your dog.'

"Shake hands, Mitten! Rexy here does it! Come on! So can you!"

'Don't give me that 'hairball' excuse again. Just admit it - you don't like my cooking!'

Cat strenuously denies hat poo under the bed is anything to do with him...

"Holy smokes, he's undefeatable!"

Cat eyes up cocktail olive.

"She feeds me the same stuff every single day, yet I can't help approaching it like I have NO idea what it could possibly be!"

'Guarding the house, bringing Master his newspaper and slippers does not require much skill, does it? Catching mice, on the other hand...'