Feasting Friend Pillows

"Tia Carmen's not happy unless she can send people away with a plate of leftovers for the road."

"I invited a few friends over who think you should see a psychiatrist."

The Fourth Little Pig

"Christmas drinks 'n' nibbles system"

'Do you have any catsup?'

Bad for you but to die for

'I never should have ordered the diet platter.'

Can I give you a slice of the action?

"All of tonight's specials dance around the whole GMO thing."

Every time you make a blend, somewhere, a wine maker dies.

"Sarah has two mommies and both of them are good cooks."

A Woman Holding Canapes

"How sweet, your hand is trembling."

I wish I'd had the review.

Emotional Bling

'Now, what's Italian for pizza?'

Country farmhouse loaf / Inner city highrise loaf.

"Yeah, my life flashed before my eyes!...OK, it was food - all the food I've ever eaten flashed before my eyes."

"Hey, you two! What did I say about sharing?!"

Santa Dog

I'm your girlfriend and best friend so I get twice as many slices

The Martini is invented.

"Is this the same gold bar I gave you last year?"

"For dessert, absolutely no flambé!"

'To be honest I'm sick of truffles.'

Hold those deer to you near to you this Christmas.

"When it comes to turkeys, Mom, you sure know your stuff-ing."

"Never mind the porridge, someone's stolen my woodland mushroom collection."

"I'm retaining doughnuts."

'Must you have chips with everything Sir Francis.'

"Larry never gains an ounce!"

Authentic Street Cuisine of New York City

'Thank you waiter - my wife's the rabbit.'

'Our guest tonight certainly needs no introduction.'