Fear Philosopher T-Shirts

"Lighten up, pal, it's only a spider!"

"....bird flu? No, I want something against the fear epidemic!"

Chiller Theatre

"For most people, the sense of panic will be mild."

"Unfortunately, at this age I express glee and stark raving terror in the exact same way."

"They're very time-sensitive."

"Pencil eraser."

When the Job Market Shifts, Always Remember That It's All Your Fault

'Let me get this straight: you'll answer three questions, but only three questions? No kidding? Boy, is this my lucky day or what?'

The Best Laid Plans

'Was it the beaver dream again?'

Horror writer.

Caterpillar Paranoia

"Did I like it? It frightened me to death! I had to close my eyes four times, my stomach is in knots, and I'll probably have nightmares for a week!... I loved it!"

The Propaganda Machine.

"I love the part when they scream, 'Hey! That's no log!'..."

"And what do you think will happen if you do get on the couch?"

Agoraphobic Explorer

'If fate had been kinder, either of us might be living in the White House.'

Someone's always fooling around with my toys phobia.

The Scream at the movie theater.

Bob's fear of pickpockets takes an ugly turn: 'Yes, I know I', the one who said you need to confront and challenge your issues, but...'

'Don't hurt it.'

I'm afraid of heights.

"Dude - don't believe in all that nonsense you read on the internet."

'Are you a man or are you a mouse?'

Everyone knows the naked truth about me phobia.

Spider Horror Movies

'You didn't have to be so realistic about your fear of the unknown!'

I can never get away from my spouse phobia.

"My name is Pennywise. My preferred pronoun is 'It.'"

'He was a very claustrophobic person.'

'That poor boy is afraid of his own shadow.'

"I'm thinking of making a career change into fearmongering."

'The sad thing is, Jonah's so afraid of the water now, he won't even take a bath.'