Fatherhood Admirer Gifts

'I just wanted a glass of plain water.'

'Another expectant father looking forward to paternity leave.'

'Listen! It kicked again right here. I swear it's not appendicitis!'

'Not today,son-not on Fathers' Day!'

"I was thinking of joining a parenting class."

'I'm really tired of hearing about her pious children, the angel food cake.'

"Can you wangle me some parental leave?"

Baby Shower

"That's right, my dad is training for the Pamplona fun-run..."

The day after Father's Day.

'I'm not giving you a lift. If you want to run away from home, run.'

'Here's your choice. Grounded for a week or a walk around the Mall with me while I wear this.'

"Dad, if Mom ever has a boyfriend, I hope he's just like you."

'I'm begging you, please don't let me go!'

Fathers Saluting Each Other.

'A rocking horse? Boy! What will they think of next?!'

"Well ok....but in your case I'll need DNA proof!"

'Don't try so hard . . . I want a dad, not a homey!. . .'

'I'm afraid the legislation only covers one partner.'

'In a surprise move today, the Kennedy family applied for statehood.'

'With a boss, a wife and three teenaged kids, I haven't had much time to worry about international affairs.'

Al Pacino

'I am too the boss of you!'

"My daddy has a broken leg, so I need to mark his territory for him..."

"I thought that sperm-bank donors remained anonymous."

The Dad Great for Car, Home, or Office!

'Why did you call me son? You're not my father.'

Men Parenting

'Settle down now and Daddy will take you for a nice ride.'

'He'll make an ideal husband-we could do with those feet in the family'.

"I told you, always support the baby's head!"

A monster waves to its child in the maternity ward.

Poll. I'll probably vote for General Washington, but it's Ben Franklin I'd like to have a beer with!

World's greatest dad: free toy inside!

'Can you fix it, Daddy?'