Father-son Bonding Specialist Gifts

'I know I'm your father, but I'm also your attorney and these father-son talks are considered billable hours.'

Young golf ball getting "the talk".

'Mom, Dad just got a nibble.'

'I love doing things with you, Dad but couldn't you just coach my soccer team?'

"Son, the world is full of disappointments. About 7.7 billion of them."

Remote controlled car on a boat.

Another Time Travel Pair o' Ducks.

'OK. Lose weight, stop smoking, get fit, get a better job, spend more time with the kids, cut back on the booze, be better with money and buy a speed boat.'

First Steps

Boy on father's knee

'Dad, can I borrow the club tonight?'

Boy sits at father's desk at work and says on phone: 'OK, I'll have my boys call your boys ..'

"I am wearing sunglasses and using sunscreen with 50% UV protection. What could possibly go wrong?"

Psychiatrist to man dressed in baseball jersey: 'You've never gotten over the fact your father wouldn't play catch with you?'

"Dad, Cruz and I are going to see 'Planet of the Apes.'"

"Dad, can you tell me what a solar eclipse is?"

'Let daddy know if you get a bite.'

"Next to my two years in the Marines, you're the best thing I've ever done."

"Don't take it personally, Dad, but if I need advice, I'll ask my phone...it's a lot smarter than you are!"

'I suppose this means I'll have to find someone else to practice my karate on.'

'Using live bait, I see.'

'Son, the hardest thing about fly fishing is catching the flies.'

The men from the boys.

"So, you see, what you were really looking for was a deeper connection with your father, and not the dentist's office down the hall."

'It's a tough world, son. You inflate. You get kicked around all your life. Then one day - bam! You deflate.'

"Time for thaw awkward father son talk. You know, the one about fluctuating interest rates and instability in the markets."

As a boy, Isaac Newton ignored his father's advice to persevere, preferring instead to let things drop.

3 Easy Christmas Crafts

"A full stomach and a sunny spot: that, my boy, is the secret of happiness..."

'I invented them yesterday and Junior already has them souped up.'

'Dad! What time is it when the big hand is on eight and the little hand is all over the floor?'

Tee for Two

Donald questioned if his dad's guiding hand on his shoulder would remain with him forever.

'It's a hat.' 'It's a cravat.'

'Dressage? But Son, what about something more virile like Rodeo or Polo?'