Father Christmas Fans Pillows

'What is clausophobia?' - 'Fear of Father Christmas.'

'Another expectant father looking forward to paternity leave.'

"You do realize his ‘nose so bright’ is going to attract a horde of Defense Department drones."

"Anachronism or not, it just ain't the fourth without the ribs and Willie Nelson."

"I love these old decorations!"

"Yes, we voted remain - how did you guess?"

“He’s timid, very shy. I rescued him from some wacko who tried to steal Christmas.”

"There's gotta be a way to make money off this."

Santa's wash day.

Meet Santa's entourage

"Hi, my name is Rudolph." "Hi Rudolph." "And I have a drinking problem." "Hi Rudolph." "Hi Rudolph." "Hi Rudolph." "Hi Rudolph." "Hi Rudolph."

Phil gets a head start on his holiday decorating.

"Imagine! In the past year alone, Thomas Jefferson has learned to speak Swahili and play the glockenspiel."

"I hacked into Santa's computer and discovered we're not on his naughty list. I feel we're letting our generation down."

Ring those Christmas bells!

'Happens every year - I can never remember where I put the tree decorations.'

'Not today,son-not on Fathers' Day!'

Father Christmas stuck on plane wing

"Well I don't know how they fly when I can't!"

"Seeing as you've been so generous giving goals away lately, you're down to play Santa at the Christmas party!"

"Can you wangle me some parental leave?"

Christmas reunions!

"Dude, last night was nuts."

'Your dad only works one day a week but mine only works ONE day a year!'

The day after Father's Day.

"I love Boxing Day"

'I'm not giving you a lift. If you want to run away from home, run.'

"Naughty? Nice? It's a bit more nuanced than that..."

'Remember, it's not just gimme. It's please gimme.'

Season's Greetings and a Prosperous New Year.

"How can Santa eat all those cookies and drink all that milk in one night? Well, like everything else when it comes to Santa, it's magic. . ."

'Rats!!...Socks!!...Again!!'

inflation at Christmas

Easter Bunny Pushing Father Christmas Out The Way.