Fashionista Of The Absurd T-Shirts

"I don't want to look ridiculous at the clown convention!"

'Now that I've lost weight, I can't afford new clothes in my size.'

"Too 'Book of Genesis'?"

Middle-Age Superheroes

"They're not Levi Strauss - they're not Levi Tate."

'I'm looking for something to impress the shareholders.'

"Now that's a great number if you want to be protected from the entire environment."

'I hate waking up with coffin hair.'

"I don't think anyone will notice your ninty seven pound lime green lycra swimming trunks Terry."

'The Prom Dress: One Week Later'

'I'm just curious, which one of you was dropped off by their boyfriend on a really fast motorcycle?'

"Wow, you look sexy today."

Bernice Mountain Dog

Falloon's Menswear. Where it's always brown trouser time.

Buy One Get One Free Sign Outside Shoe Shop

"Marie Antoinette? This is she."

"I thought I put on my 'big boy' pants this morning but apparently they were my 'fire me' pants."

"I don’t know, honey – sort of makes you look like a blockhead."

Naked Furniture

"Remember, you're selling home appliances, so look more ... dishwashery."

Crocodile Shoes

'You should never wear a green parrot with a blue suit.'

Haute Cuisine Meets Low Couture

Hoody Woodpecker.

"I blacked out for ten minutes this morning - Then I realised I had put my hoodie on backwards."

"Look what I found, this beautiful Christmas poncho. Isn't it festive?!"

Salad Hat

Bertie Wooster type teaching a parrot to talk

A sign outside the "Museum of Modern Gift Items" reads "T-shirts of the Masters Sale".

"I'm looking for a tie that retracts a statement."

Joe's Tuxedos

Emma's Bridal Wear: Gowns Veils Trains

Visual Gag Hosiery Hosiery for Hoses of all types

Work clothes.

"Now these prescription glasses are popular with our clients who like to be stylish yet lay low."