Fashion Statement Analyzer Gifts

"This isn't a mustache. It's nose hair."

"Yes, they're hair extensions, but you have to agree, I look fabulous..."

"Honey, do these sweatpants make me look like I prefer we stay in tonight so I can watch the game?"

"He thought he'd stand out more in a body suit."

'No way Doug! You can not stick it to the man in new season, smart casual menswear!'

Born to be Mild.

Artsy. Fartsy.

Hairstyles

'Johnny, personal feelings like loud neckties and long jokes; best left at home.'

"My husband's in advertising."

A girl wearing a t-shirt saying ', la'

Your Ad Here.

Jake decided to wear a suit for the first day of his new job.

"I warned you that tattoo wouldn't change colour."

'My boss collects stupid hats, Is yours for sale?'

'I made a good living applying tattoos and a fortune removing them.'

'Your hair is messy,stand up straight. You look unkempt.'

Figure 1. Termite queen maternity wear

"We all see it. We all see it. . ."

"I told him he's going to regret it, but what can I do? He's eighteen now."

"I like the suit, but do you have it in a smaller check?"

"I don't know what's happening, but lately I've been feeling afraid of my own clothes"

"I'd like to have myself declared legally blonde."

"Wow! Why do you have no tattoos?"

Tattoo Parlour: 'I brought the pig because I have no space left.'

'I want a bad-ass snake tattoo.'

T-shirts will allegiance to different types of music on, while one guy has a shirt that reads 'middle of the road is all right with me.'

'Give me the most soft and gentle looking unicorn tattoo you've got!'

'Edwards never comes out of his comfort zone.'

"I think she's fully committed to me - She got an 'I'm with stupid' TATTOO!"

"I'm having second thoughts about my new bunny tattoo. I think it might make me look too scary and dangerous?"

'What do you suggest we do with the other 2,000 yards?'

'What the heck? They're not cows, sheep, pigs, tigers, cats or unicorns: They're kids in onesies!'

"My mum said the only way I could get a tattoo was over her dead body."

'The designer stubble is getting a little out of hand Rasputin!'