Fashion Revamp Seeker T-Shirts

"I had an unexpected glimpse of myself in a mirror today. I need a new briefcase."

'Something for the weekend, Sir?'

'Now that I've lost weight, I can't afford new clothes in my size.'

Two women wearing identical dresses head toward exchange window at department store.

Mr. Punch's Fancy Ball

"Can you make wishes on fake eyelashes?"

"Oh to be young and in love and wear things cut on the bias."

'Awright...Who's the dirty, lowdown varmint who's copyin' my plaid-shirt-and-stone-wash-jeans-with-matching-boots-and-vest ensemble?'

Life Store Guide: Make-up and jewellery

"And now. . . which shoes?"

"I can never get my sunglasses on my head the way my hairdresser does"

"An everything Martini, please."

Pampered and poodled.

'These fit just right. Do you have anything too tight?'

"If the economy's ground to a halt, we can help by carrying on shopping."

"Are you looking to accentuate or camouflage?"

'They've certainly got designs on your purse!'

'Sure I'm late. . . I not only have to get ready for school. . . now I have to get ready in case some idiot takes my picture for YouTube.'

Goldilocks and the seventeen black shoulder bags

Mister Pretty Shoes

"Let's try for dignified yet playful, while maintaining the spirit of preservation."

"I don't like your application."

"Do you do much walking?"

"Some fitting room. Nothing fits!"

"It's the only way I can justify buying so many shoes."

"I feel there's a whole culture around mules."

"It's really quite simple: Shave off the soul patch and the car is yours."

"You won't believe this but I haven't a thing to wear"

'I'll take it!'

Elegant woman in backless dress.

A member of a very populous consumer group attempts to go shopping...

"He's deliciously vintage."

"The suit - it's rejecting your body."

Changing Room Decisions

"Of course, lots of women are just going bare-headed."