Fashion-forward With Frugality Pillows

Actually, not overspending on the latest fashion is the new black.

'It's rather unorthodox, but it appears the deposit refund on the empties will cover your first interest payment.'

"It was terrifying experience being faced with that kind of compulsive, insane behaviour...I tell you it's positively the last time I put foot in the sales!"

Scot to a Greek: 'Love your outfit.'

'We are entering an era of thrift, so in place of champagne and canapes, there will be a jumble sale.'

"I’ll tell ya who’s got a ‘dark side’: my cat, that’s who. You should see what she did to my Manolo Blahnik pumps!"

"I'm on a tight budget. Make it look like I cut at myself."

'I told him not to wear stretchy pants to dinner.'

"You're fortunate. Stubble looks really good on you."

'We don't know what it is but it was in the sale so we thought we'd better get one before they sold out.'

'It makes conferences so much cheaper, no travel costs and we only need to buy our own drinks!'

The Walk of Shame

Christmas sweater alternatives

"Overkill, dude."

'Which fashion magazine do you recommend?'

Standardisation: "I don't understand...it fitted us OK!"

'I received your list of the type of company car you'd like to receive. The Maserati, Ferrari, Porche and Viper isn't possible, but there is a 1978 Pinto with your name written all over it.'

'It's just full of dirty laundry but it makes me feel much more hip.'

Beware of Dawg.

Son, you'll never be quick on the draw unless you pull your dang pants up.

Welcome all to the monthly gathering of Tightwads United. Hi there. Hello. Hey. On tonight's agenda: Dumpster diving, coupon clipping, and a special lecture. How to carpool while always getting the other person to drive. I'm like a god. Woohoo!! Yeah!!! Clap clap clap clap clap clap clap. Tightwads United.

"I'm never ready for sweater weather."

"We've been milked all day at the office. Now we girls deserve a little R&R."

'You've had the eye exam. Now buy the t-shirt!'

"Is that neat whisky?"

"For Pete's sake, Helen, will you break down and buy a hair dryer!"

Electricity Bills

A tailor measuring a jacket.

"I want you to work late. Put on your overtime shoes."

"If my mother and father had wanted to see Yves Saint Laurent's initials on my possessions, one supposes they would have named me Yves Saint Laurent."

Bad times for retirees.

Two men, one with his abdomen outside his trousers, the other with it inside. 'The Tummy Tuck.'

"The valuation of my business includes its goodwill."

'You must have something in my size?'

Stormtrooper takes off the helmet.