Fashion Consultant Pillows

In the Guru District

Handbags Authenticated

"...between a medium and a large - I like to call it 'Marge'."

"It's remarkable, Mr. Volmer. You have the clothes of a man half your age!"

"We're looking for an outfit that says we are really going to buckle down this semester."

Gates of Heaven "Sorry buddy- no entry without a tie"

"Do you want to see the right size first, or should we work up to it gradually?"

'What a waste of time - you should buy non-iron shirts like me,'

Instructions for Bow Tie Wearers

"I prefer to get a few classic items and build a wardrobe around them."

"I like you in that one—it gives you an aura of mindfulness."

In and out of fashion

'When you say that it fits like a glove, is that because it covers my hands?'

"You're right. It does send a powerful message."

'The sales assistant said they were 'on trend'...'

"That one goes particularly well with you tie."

"Why, you poor child. You're running right over to Brooks Brothers."

"Actually, it isn't that daring, you've put it on back to front."

'Just curious, Dawkins, what does the corporate dresscode say about clamdiggers?'

'They're both nice - which can you ill afford least?'

Woman trying on clothes and ripping them - Breakages to be paid for.

'A poloneck covers a multitude of chins.'

"...we are able to offer lifestyle advice...but that doesn't extend to whether that jacket and tie combination is funky"!

"I don't feel comfortable with this body."

'Neck a little tight, sir?'

"You'd like to see it in a smaller size...congratulations!"

"Can you find me something that makes me look like George Clooney?"

'Do you have this one in a XXX large?'

"It was really embarrassing. They had to use the Jaws of Life to get me out of my skinny jeans."

'Hoo boy, yes! B-o-o-o-ring!!'

'You passed the physical, but your underwear is on the critical list.'

"I like your yellow tie...It matches your teeth"

How would Madam like to pay?

'For heaven's sake, Lois, when are you going to give up this mad dieting of yours?' (woman falls through drain).

Every company needs the aesthetic sense of female colleagues.