Farmland Jokers T-Shirts

'Man, with that much bull at your disposal you should be running for congress!'

'Keep me informed of the herds' mood.'

"No, I like the plan. Just saying, have you ever done any actual tunnelling?"

'Oh Hi!'

'How many times have I told you not to hit the ball with your head?'

'Henrietta is so self-confident.'

A sure sign of rain

'Some dogs are meant to be working dogs and some aren't.'

'Pass the salt, will ya, buddy?'

Alas poor Daisy, I knew her well!

'Mother, there's something you're not telling me about that alien invasion, I can feel it!'

"Static cling."

"Don't be so dramatic. You tell me you're pregnant every day?"

'How are you at thinking outside the flocks?'

"You're living in a fantasy world, Nelly. Farmer Dave doesn't know you're alive. Plus, he's a human being, he's married, he's the church pastor and he's secretly gay."

"That was definitely mine."

Emergency room doctor about half cow: 'Farming accident. Be sensitive - she's beside herself.'

'MEN! We've got a fire at the cattle shed! Do we want rare, medium or well done?'

Objects in mirror bear no relation to reality.

Dr B orge tests his new cow-fart ozone depletion meter.

'Hey Sally, do these new capris make me look pretentious?'

'Ok, this sty is great and all, but can we get some huge explosions? Wilbur, could you say 'it's about to get real'?'

'Tropical fruit, imported cheese, coconuts...I'm not really into that 'eat locally' stuff.'

Shocking cows and chickens with the ingredients of the cake.

Worse case of chicken pox I've ever seen!

"I call it 'Moona Lisa'."

'With proper flossing there's no reason for hens to not have teeth.'

The Mongolian Steps Slinky Cows.

'I promise, you're not crossing to the Dark Side.'

'Nonsense! They can't All have headaches.'

"Ok, let's try it one last time. It's 'Ahhhhhh'..."

Testing...testing...one, two, three...

'This is your third speeding ticket in a week. Sure your horse didn't get into some genetically modified hay?'

'I overheard the farmer say I have a future at McDonalds.'

'Well, no, I wouldn't say I'm a mad cow, although Farmer Brown does get on my nerves once in a while!'