Fan Of Wordplay T-Shirts

'That's the worst case of acid reflux I've ever seen!'

'There's a gentleman here for a cleaning, Doctor. It's unclear whose.'

'I just found out that the mantra you gave me is Pig Latin!'

'Friend, we have a bar code here.'

"I said, ‘I hit on your sister!’"

Hedusa

They're Brazillian!

"Good heavens - Poetry in motion"

'Mugged? Oh, no...I live next to a golf course.'

"Can I borrow the car keys?"

"Ironically, this is the living room."

"Staff support"

"That's the guy I hired to read Proust for me."

"My dad says we eat honey 'cause it has lots of vitamin Bee."

If you bathe a skunk in tomato juice, it will smell like a dog. A bird in the hand is better than two in your shorts. Never wear aqua after Thanksgiving. Unconventional wisdom.

Guy at drink stand says to Medium: 'Medium?'

'I'll have the crab cake, and he'll have the crabby cake.'

"It's OK, I'm preordained."

Boneheads! I never said I was bringing ten condiments!

'The plumber said he can't come right now, but promised to put us on his 'wading list'. Cute, huh?'

"Has anyone seen the dog?"

Shakespeare does stand-up comedy in the round.

"Would you relax? All you guys are so tense. I just wanted to tell you to your face how enigmatic I find you."

Please Drove Carefully.

Lesser known greek gods,

'So tell me why you think you're suffering from seasonal ineffective disorder.'

Vlad the Inhaler

Gay Times...

'What amazes me most is that years ago I couldn't even spell teacher - now I are one!'

What nationality were your parents? North or south Poles?

Wok. Don't Wok.

"‘Extra vile old ox’? No, sir – it stands for ‘extra virgin olive oil.’"

Punt Cake

Smith Academy. A Tradition of Excellense.

'I've been called some mean things as a baby boomer, but 'Pig in the Python' really hurts.'