Fan Of The Macabre Gifts

Grim Reaper birthday

'Cannibalism has always repulsed me - until i tasted Aunty Judy's knees'

"What are you looking at, four eyes?"

"My great-great-grandfather was forced to flee Europe because of religious persecution."

"In hindsight, we shouldn't have had him cremated."

"Most women find me too cutthroat."

'Due to recent staff cut-backs and consolidations, I'll be handling your death AND your taxes this year!'

"Dad, can we please just buy a week wacker?"

"What a way to go."

"May I ask what it's in connection with?"

'Oh great, these guys again! The big guy can't fit inside the MRI scanner, sheet boy falls right through it, and The Count's images never develop...'

'I'm death for goodness sake - why do I have to adopt a more healthy lifestyle?'

'The owner would have shown you around himself, but he doesn't rise untill after sunset.'

"I want to be upfront. At this point, I'm only looking for a casual hookup of Frankenstein."

Poetry reading nightly

"I just love take-out."

"Wow, souls seem a lot heavier lately"

'Whatever it is you're doing down there, Malcolm, I think it's affecting the television.'

"Don't miss a single word, Edgar. I am not going to dictate this poem again: once upon a midnight dreary, while I pondered, weak and weary..."

"Mom!!"

The grim reaper (of humans) and the angel of death (for dogs) are foreshadowing the imminent death of a man and his doh.

"Back in 15 min."

'Bad man... you're a bad man!'

'Please excuse the mess guys.My husband's doing a correspondence course in Embalming.'

"I'm worried about Junior... all he wants to do is kill things."

Vampire Humor

"You must be the artist."

Monster on horizon warning sign.

"On the plus side, it's nice to be doing something together."

"Oh my....Look how much you've grown."

Frankenstein Collectibles: Buyer Beware

"Yep...Isn't she a beaut! And just one previous owner."

Sixth Sense Morgue: (Icy Dead People).

"I wonder how much he paid for that view."

"Each night Lily said her prayers... As the fleas and gnats do bite and gnaw my skin, so shall the worms eat and consume me, in the dirt and dust of the Lord's earth. Amen. And each night her prayers freaked her parents out."