Fan Of Pet Humor Gifts

'So, you haven't been de-clawed...'

'Table scraps, doggie-bag goodies, dropped hot dogs, the cat's dish of food and your master's slippers.'

"Gone with the wind with cats" "Frankly, my dear, I don't give a damn." "Me neither, who cares—let's take a nap."

"Oh, wow! Is that stunning or what?" "Mid-century classic. Should be in a museum. Let's pee on it." "Totally."

"I'm down to only one nap a day. From 8 am t0 8 pm."

Pet Entertainers

Excuse me.. Are you Dog Friendly?

Cat mistakes bars for toilets.

Grinning dog points at missing cat poster with glee

The First Cone of Shame.

Feline Stand Up - 'Fetching...how dumb is that? And another thing I don't understand...what's with all that TAIL WAGGING?'

'I think he got embarrassed because of the sweater. . . Another dog started laughing. I told him it was just wheezing, but he wasn't buying it.'

'If you must know, yes, I do sometimes fake purring.'

"Ask the gumshoe. He'll tell ya the saucer was empty when I got there. Go on, gimme a purr detector test. I got all night."

'The last guy I worked for kept me on a short leash.'

"It says 'beware of robot dog.'"

"I'm thinking sixty nine."

Doggy conductor

Vet to owner about dog with bird at chest: 'I suspect heartworm.'

The Karate Kitten.

"You're back. Hold on … just give me a minute."

"Right. Women adore him, men want to be like him, and YOU... well, you're hopeless. So, am I the ONLY one who sees through this guy?"

Dog Calenders.

"So what if they notice a stain? Everyone gets tummy aches. Besides, we’re conserving energy."

Cat and Dog both eating from wrong bowls.

'I'm worried about that dog's hearing,Doris.'

"FYI – your camel hair blazer started it."

"I don't think you fully thought out your escape plan!" "Meow..."

"Did you know that cats aren't mentioned anywhere in the Bible?"

"I'll have the 'All you can eat from the menu, the kitchen, and the dumpster' special."

"Anatomy of a cat"

"I know I said, 'If there's anything I can do,' but I draw the line on licking your incision for you."

'Will Work For Food, The Take, Like, Two Bites And Walk Away.'

My dog is an honor student at the Curtis Obedience School.

"Well, perhaps 'guilty' is too strong a word."