Family Tradition Breaker Pillows

Johnny departs from the Family Banjo Tradition.

'Please don't be hurt, Dad, but I've decided to go into gathering instead of hunting.'

"Your college student, home for the holidays, waits until dinner to announce that he is now a vegan. . ."

"O young, naive one...you must know the golden rule of the kitchen. To avoid the mother of all disrespects...never criticize the cooking of a family elder."

"Gracie, today I'm teaching you a Bermudez family tradition...passed down from generation to generation! Vamonos! Out! Now!"

"Take the off this minute, young lady."

"When I was young, we personally prepared all the food for each and every meal!"

'He spoke his first words today Serge - 'ello. . . ello. . . ello'!'

"One day you can participate in Take Our Daughters and Sons to Work Day as a parent."

'Let's open presents Christmas Eve AND morning. That way Christmas lasts for TWO days.'

'Oh yeah? Well, to hell with tradition. We're building a snow woman!'

'Gentlemen, we make money the old-fashioned way, and it's got to STOP!'

"The Flying Wallendas at home"

'My father carried this sign before me, as did his father before him.'

Tyler missed the old days before his parents used behavioral tracking software.

'I'm so glad this bedtime story comes in audio.'

"I love spending time together as a family. It brings us together. It makes us stronger. It helps us understand each other."

"First destination: the recycling center to get rid of these cans."

Lore and legend of the Pennypackers

"It was our grandmother's wedding dress—we had her exhumed so you could wear it."

'Are you on any medication other than your Grandma's chicken soup?'

"I'm pretty sure your grandma's secret apple pie recipe is not considered an unauthorized classified document."

'What do you mean, you don't want to dry grapes in the sun for dessert wines, like your father? He's a big success--and only 32!'

The family tradition lives on: I won the Long Jump and the Triple Jump events...

"Tell me again why we couldn't get an Easter bunny."

"When I moved here after your mother passed... The first thing I did was make this altar...so I could pray for her. But your father said, 'Just no photos.'"

"Dad...how do you know when to stop?"

"Thank you for coming with me. This is a sacred family tradition."

Christening

"I can tell you that's not the version of Uncle Sam that I grew up with."

No right to wear white.

What do you mean you don't want a nose ring?

'Let's see what Santa has in his sack for a little boy or girl...'

"Mom does this for everyone's birthday, if you don't applaud, no dessert for a week."

"I found my great aunt Irma's delicioso roast turkey recipe!"