Family Time Fanatic Pillows

"Mom wants us to spend 'Quality time' together, so don't blame me."

Holiday Venn Diagram

'Dad, why musn't the little ball go in the hole?'

'Seriously??'

'We don't work on Christmas. You can celebrate the holidays with your family!'

"Hey Dad, wanna kick around the soccer ball?"

Parenthood & Grandparenthood

'Let the creepy crawly hunt begin!'

I like the Jets...I guess

"They grow up so fast."

"Christmas - what a fuss eh?"

'William, I've decided to go back to work so I can get a little rest during the day.'

No caption (A young bald eagle plays a claw game full of fish as his parent stands behind him).

Haircuts

"She's been so creative lately."

"Mom! Your cell phone’s ringing ... it’s Dad!"

"Jack and Jill went up the hill to fetch a pail of water. Jack fell down, broke his crown and Jill said 'I told you so'."

"This is nice, but I can't help but think we forgot something."

"I think I've reached that age when I don't remember if I've forgotten something."

'You and Rags working together make great dinosaur finders.'

'Sure, a drawing on Facebook has coverage, but nothing wows the family like a spread on the fridge.'

"Is she breastfeeding in public?! That's disgusting!"

'She's just great with the children.'

No one has ever been accused of choosing bad relatives.

"They’re baseballs. You throw ’em."

"Actually, I'm really looking for blessings that aren't in disguise"

"Can I have another sausage Dad?"

Rusty, not believing in God, seized his chance...

"If you hold it to your ear you can hear the ice caps melting."

"Some advice please...How do I squeeze 9 days work into 5 and still see my family?"

"Mom, does the Russian borscht you made for dinner give me foreign-policy experience?"

Office pics on dinner table.

'Congratulations, dear! Your home cooked dinner was so good you'd think it was an expensive frozen entree!'

Photographer Phone: 'Okay everybody, SMILE!'

'Your fancy new grill works great. . .and we didn't even have to turn it on.'