Family Dynasty Fan Pillows

BIG BUSINESS: "He's going places in this company - his father owns it!"

"Can I borrow the car keys?"

'Another expectant father looking forward to paternity leave.'

Family with pets.

"We're ecstatic about our new au pair."

"I thought it would be nice if we had a forum where we could get together and have screaming tantrums."

"Look at their faces! What did they expect? They never visited her! Of course the will says her money goes to the cat shelter. . ."

'She posted her first blog today.'

'With these alternative fertility treatments you never quite know how things turn out,'

"Nothing else in my room can spin on the floor like a bottle."

A child as a pet substitute.

'We're playing I'm a mummy with lots of different daddies!'

"Could you please downgrade this to a C? High expectations bring out the worst in my parents."

George Washington's sister was always getting him into trouble.

'So, you're an organ-grinder's monkey? A professional beggar? Is that how you intend to support my daughter?'

"I'm tired of this full-time job. I want a part-time job."

'You are right, honey, it's raining too much. It's not the best day to visit my mom.'

"We need to have a serious talk."

"Careful George. You don't want to hurt our baby boy."

"Daddy, can I have a pony killed?"

'Not today,son-not on Fathers' Day!'

'Yoy know perfectly well WHICH corner, Jamie!'

'Quit playing kick ball with your brother!'

Bears: 'Mummy, mummy can I sleep over at Jessica's this winter.'

"The kids - Prince Englebert and Princess Felicia - would like us to move into the olde monarchs' home."

"...and then while I was at soccer practice they moved house."

"Think about it: Toby's the only ram here, so we have to be half brothers!"

'I'm leaving my wife because of another woman. Her mother.'

'It's good, Timmy, but it's not refrigerator good.'

"This is my son...I want him to work his way up all the way from the bottom- even if it takes all day."

'I want to thank my biological and surrogate Mother, my two Dads.. .'

'We're identical twins, but I'm luckier than he is!'

"Daddy can't help you, son. Daddy's a product of the 'me' generation."