Family Business Member Gifts

"This is my son Simon he's here on work experience."

'Well, now that I know he's the owner's son, yes, he's the best damned wine steward I've ever seen.'

'Shhhh. Fido inherited seventy percent of this company.'

'Investment charts can be complicated, son, but that usually means, 'bonuses'.'

"Some day, son, all this will be yours. ... Actually, you know what? You can have it now."

'When training my son, keep him totally ignorant. I'm grooming him to be VP in-charge-of -denials.'

John W. Law., John W. Law Jr., Robert Law, Janet Law, Attorneys at Law

"And this is my junior partner, my son, Ira."

'In the interest of spending more time with my children, I've put Bobby and Emily in charge of corporate strategy.'

'Don't worry, Dad. I'm going to turn this company around 360 degrees!'

'He spoke his first words today Serge - 'ello. . . ello. . . ello'!'

If business gets any worse I'll have to start laying off relatives.

"We've doubled our staff in the last six months." (Smith and Smith - baby in playpen behind desk).

Tree's Tree Nursery. Get this. Dad is selling those goofy upside-down tomato planters. What idiot would buy them? Thanks! I'll let you know how it works! My idiotic bio teacher.

"You work for the family business, and I am your father, not the patriarchal oppressor..."

'Someday, son, 50 of this will belong to your ex-wife,'

"This is what happens when a family business doesn't have a succession plan!"

"Hmmm...impressive CV! Y'know, I have a feeling that you'll go far in this company...."

"No, Dad. All this belongs to me right now. I acquired it in a hostile takeover."

The last of the Mom and Pop brokerage houses

It's not a figure of speech - this is the corporate ladder.

"Year after year we sit here quietly raising eyebrows, son."

"...and remember son. Don't let anybody push you around!"

'Someday, son...all this will be Mine.'

'Someday, Son, this will all be your problem.'

'Where did we go wrong?'

'I handed over my company to my son and he's doing better than I ever did. Unfortunately he's starting school next year...'

'What do you mean you don't want to be a model? Just what do you plan to do with the rest of your life?'

'Someday, son, this will all be yours...to give to the IRS, thanks to the back taxes I owe.'

'Of course, we're family-owned & operated in India.'

"This is a family operation, Ben, and we're evicting you from our family."

'Someday, Son, all of this will be yo....!'

'There's no need for you to state your opinion, son. Just lipsynching mine will do fine.'

A Mom and Pop Operation

'It's a terrific family business: We have about 53 staff-members...'