Faithful Thrill-seeker Gifts

"Please, God, help me get up, that's all I ask... I'll go right to church..."

Very Difficult Conversations

First National Bank. Keep life exciting --- Ask about our variable rate, interest-only mortgages.

Pole vaulter jumping Lover's Leap.

'Time to buy.'

Money pouring in for a 'Acme Doodad Company's IPO.

"Some idiot spread the rumour that the boss had called in sick! Now look what's happened to the tobacco and coffee stocks!"

'Even More Disciples'

The GODFATHER Ride 25¢

Snowflake Investments...penny stocks, junk bonds: 'Here today, gone tomorrow!'

''No other gods before me'? Oh - You're one of THOSE types.'

"Dow's up!"

Yomp Investments - Big risks sometimes means BIG BUCKS!: 'I'm a little uneasy about the 'sometimes'...'

"Ahh, shade."

Jesus breaks the bread.

'What do you call money that slides off the collection plate?'

Swinging through the jungle.

"Our stock is down. Start some rumors on Wall Street that it's going up."

Tunnel of Workaholics

'I find if I'm the first one in and the first one out, Ponzi schemes can be very lucrative.'

Bull Riding on the Stock Market

"You will note that their ability to comprehend, assess and process information increases dramatically when Professor Podhertz throws in the cat."

'And now, here's our own Ted Slimbuck to explain all those ups and downs in the stock market.'

Tightrope Walk of Romance

'He's chasing the market.'

' Love and pole vault'

'Fathers Day.'

'Don't jump! The latest market sector bubble to burst is making a turnaround!'

Now playing. Zombie Truck-Driving Maniacs II. If I'm too scared, can we cuddle. It's why I make him see these horrible movies.

'We ride the storm until greed is back.'

Cross Umbrella

Economic

'Don't jump Pumroy! Just remember: today's frantic selling can quickly become tomorrow's frantic buying.'

'One really nice thing up here is that it's always very easy to get an audience with a Pope.'

Grexit