Faithful Brews Gifts

"For those of you visiting our church for the first time just raise your hand and our ushers will refresh your coffee."

You got that beer that the monks make, didn't you?

"I'm getting red fruits, earth tones, and oak. Amen."

"We missed you at church Sunday."

"If anyone wants me, Ms. Clark, I'll be down in the youth department."

"Your sins are forgiven, but not your co-pay."

"I was wondering if you could recommend a good 'hoppy' beer?"

'The yeast cells are flocculating? - I don't think the kids are ready for that.'

'I brew it myself.'

Interfaith dialogue

'A funny thing happened to me on the way to the church tonight..'

Chruch member about preacher: 'Pastor Woodsley has old fashioned power point.'

''Fancy a quick pint?'

'But our secret ingredient is large quantities of Hilberg beer.'

"You order the microbrew?"

"We grind our own catnip."

'Is this seat saved?' Fundamentalism Gone Awry.

'Come to our microbrew party. It's B.Y.O.B. Bring Your Own Brewery.'

"Awkward!"

"With that craft beer, you're paying for the finest hops, choicest barleys and a lot more alcohol."

Beer versus Wine

Buster got religion in the pound and now works with other bad dogs.

'Personal?...No, I assure you, my relationship with God is strictly professional.'

"You just can't accept that I've found someone 'extra special'." Best bitter / Pale Ale / Tennants Very Very Strong Lager.

Priest reads sign above fire extinguisher that says: 'In case of quenchable fire, break glass'.

'Say - they tell me this real ale of yours is really SOMETHING,buddy!'

"It's my life line in case the rapture happens, so I'm not left behind."

Old Irascible? Someone call?

"The Convent of the Immaculate Heart Brewery"

"All the beer I can drink in a year? That's the buyout?"

'All I can say is, if you like trying new beers and hate having money, this is the one for you.'

Latte Day Saints

Moonshine Lite!

'I had to have my pacemaker readjusted since I asked Jesus into my heart.'

who says you cant make your own wine out of gooseberries