Fairytale Junkie Pillows

'Well I suppose it could've been narcolepsy, but it would've spoiled the story.'

"It's amazing, Darlin', just how fast the kids grow up!"

"Go ahead and eat her, she's a pain in the a**."

"Boil, toil and trouble, I wish I'd never started this risotto."

THE PIED PIPER OF GRAMERCY PARK

The Fourth Little Pig

"I don't care about the rating on Goodreads. We're reading Cinderella!"

A fairy with wand and crown in pink tutu

Bird feeding chick that is nesting in a knight's helmet

Swan Fairy Tales

It's not because I'm nervous. The reason I'm not eating is because I really do have butterflies in my stomach.

"Well, what did you expect? They were both missing vital organs."

The tooth fairy.

"Once upon a time, there was a princess who wasn't about to take anyone's sh*t."

"Jack and Jill went up the hill to fetch a pail of water. Jack fell down, broke his crown and Jill said 'I told you so'."

A Fairytale Update

'Are you made of sugar?'

Dragon Hair-dryer.

Fairy Library - Frontispiece to Jack and the Beanstalk

Here be dragons.

"Actually, it is a bad time — I’m rushing to get the kids out of the oven."

The Mouse Princess

Where are they now?: Office of Management & Budget - Grumpy.

"We're pleased to announce that your company has shrewdly traded a cow for some magic beans." some ma

"My, grandma, what a big nose you have! Let's take a little off the sides."

"If I can't ask for more wishes, how about more genies?"

The Seven Dwarfs After Therapy

"Snow White! It's the dancing, singing woodland creatures wondering if you want to go down the pub."

Password Error: Snow White and the seven dwarfs not recognised as eight characters.

Rapunzel in the Morning

"Ever since you changed from a frog to a Prince you seem a little jumpy!"

Igor hesitated - "You give me that silly old brain, and i'll give you these magic beans!"

"What the hell took so long?"