Fair Funster Pillows

"Guess your weight and market demographic."

"Being raised in the city, Fred didn’t quite grasp the true purpose of a game camera."

Cheeze Wiz.

Face painting by numbers.

"I told you. . . use your inside miming."

"I can't imagine why we didn't think of this before."

"Forget the allowance - I need a benefactor!"

'Superstock'

"I wanted a Meticulous Monday or a Thorough Thursday report. This reads more like a Frivolous Friday."

"These few weeks off school have convinced me that I'm definitely a stay-at-home kid."

'Not that slowly back...'

With Grandpa it was often a game of hide and sleep.

Police Cow!

Moo! OOM!

'The puppy just downloaded on your computer keyboard.'

"You think you hate me now, but just wait until I'm old and a burden to you."

'Before we begin, he's the one that's been helping me with my homework.'

"Are you ready to engage with rock-rased content?"

'Look. A mom with a handy carrying case.'

"We can do it on the net now... so it's off to the knackery for you."

"Please let go of Daddy's chest hair."

'Young Master and I are both turning two: How come I'm so much more mature than he is?'

"A raise? You want me to give you a raise? Do I look like f*ckin' Santa Claus?"

Pirates

"Don't stress. My philosophy has always been 'ewe be ewe.''"

Oh yeah! It does echo when you moo very loudly!

'He takes after your mother' (colour)

"How do you like my 'Pop art'?"

I want to be a lawn!

'Look, honey, the baby's got your mouth.'

'Are you sure it's non-drowsy? I cannot afford to oversleep...'

Face Painting.

'No honey, you can't sell him on ebay.'

'That hussy. She's always first in line for insemination.'

A kid is about to be grabbed by an oversized claw.