Factoid Fanatic Pillows

"Useless information"

"In conclusion, the Australian pelican has the longest beak of all birds...up to 12 inches...uh, I mean, 16...wait...18 inches! Whew! I have my presentation memorized forward and backward."

The Fourth Little Pig

"They think we're their best friend. Just play along with it."

The tooth fairy.

"All I can say is thank goodness for teleconferencing."

Dragon Hair-dryer.

"Hey! Where's that black cat? My ride's ready!"

Ghost School.

'Now they're just taking the piss.'

Lady of the bath...

More Reasons To Beware Of Dog

'This has all the makings of a fable. But first lets take lots of tests.'

Before the Internet

Boy and Bear and Monster

Warrior Woman

MUSHROOM MASACRE.

Newt sale

"Fred, I think you're spending altogether too much time down here with these mushrooms!"

'The new lad's collecting shells again boss.'

The witch of the west again showed no water usage for the month.

"I just found a unicorn! Apparently, they just want to be left alone."

Jack Finds The Giant Grilling At His Giant Grill

"One side is for depression, the other is for anxiety, and if you're still confused make an appointment with the cat."

'OK, so I fumbled. Now can you cure it or not?'

Nobody mourned Sir Dad-Joke.

"You had the power to leave all along - just click your heels three times, grab your coat, and sneak out without saying goodbye."

Catasaurus

"Cthulhus, sir. Thousands of 'em."

Horror Stories.

"This will be a tricky operation."

'See how the fools flee when fantasy role-play is fantasy no longer!'

A knight sent to kill a dragon armed with a fly swatter

Dragon and Dragoff