Eye Surgeon Gifts

"Jessica could you call Tech Support and ask when the lazer was last calibrated please?"

"'Whites whiter, colors vivid and bright'. Is this laundry detergent of cataract surgery?"

"I only came in to get my eyes done."

"I see so much better after cataract surgery and....wow, you're bald!"

"I'll adjust that before we do the other eye."

Wishing you a Speedy recovery from Eye Surgery.

"You've been playing with the controls, haven't you. . .?"

"I'm afraid you're going to need a new pair of corrective lashes, Mr. Fox."

'Good news, Little Orphan Annie. We've finally got some donated corneas for you.'

"I don't need the glasses, I had 3D laser eye surgery."

'He's been like this ever since he had his laser eye treatment.'

'Safety First' at the Eye Institute

'Good grief. I think your body rejected your cornea transplant.'

DO IT YOURSELF - Four new jobs we'll all have to do ourselves

Don't swallow. I've lost a contact.

"Happy birthday, dear. You still have that sparkle in your eyes!" "That sparkle burned out years ago. These are cataracts."

Now Simon would have nightmares about his mother's failing eyesight.

'Oh dear. He's got my eyes.'

The Optician At Home: "....And it didn't fit the other sister, either. Then Cinderella tried on the glasses, and she could see perfectly."

Lost. Readi

'They might look sexy and seductive but all I want to do is the crossword.'

"Oh, please. Lord, no ... I'm only 50! No, please – anything but reading glasses!"

"Pollyanna, your teeth are shot. Stop sugar coating everything!"

Love is Blind.

'Nigel, what have I told you about bringing your work home with you?'

"I'm afraid you have a condition called 'googly-eyes'."

Man blending in to his chair is reading Optical Illusion Monthly magazine.

"You really need to think about getting glasses."

"I've had these glasses since I was a kid, when my doctor told me I'd grow into them..."

"Picasso: Post cataract surgery."

'Transylvania's most famous Optometrist 'Count Mracula'.'

'No, I'm sorry, Danny. I'm afraid your dad won't be able to shoot laser beams from his eyes after surgery.'

In his old days Superman's x-ray vision declined, but it still worked as a TV remote.

Pirate eye test

"Do you feel your eyes have changed any since your last visit?" "No. They seem to be ho, ho, ho, holding their own."