Eye Chart Collector Pillows

If children's television taught optometry.

"Nothing wrong with your eyesight sir: must have been a mirage you saw..."

A presenter with a very complex chart to explain a business plan - 'And it's as simple as that!'

'I think I know what the problem is!'

"One of the most compelling graphic presentations I've ever seen!"

"It's his ego growth chart."

"As you can see, our corporate structure is turtles all the way down."

'I tried everything to turn this around but if the cops ask, I was here in this room with you guys all week.'

Wearing a sales chart as a name badge.

"We're estimating that sales are now up to about here."

'Do you want your pie-chart with everything?'

"Now at this point reality intruded."

"We don't believe in miracles. We rely on them."

"It looks like it's an eye bank."

"Helen, is it just the accountant in me, or am I sensing a tone of wistful melancholy and a bittersweet acceptance of the unfathomable mysteries of corporate life in those numbers?"

"Yes, it was 'love at first sight'. But, by the time I'd made my first opticians appointment we were already married."

Can't read 'SLOW'.

'Nicely done. You may have double-vision, but it's 20-20, 20-20.'

Goggles? Yes, he's a" windshield viper"!

Two parent snakes measuring the growth pattern of their young one across the wall.

"Buy insulation. . . sell futures."

"Civic responsibility, ethics, and a dedication to the people we serve; they're killing our business."

Childrens Eye Test

"Regarding my art collection, I know what I like."

'I don't want to make you feel bad, but I got four stars.'

"And so it begins... Now where'd I put my dang glasses..."

Optometrist practical jokes

Giant

Stockmarket - "I see fear is up five points."

Enola Holmes/Millie Bobby Brown

'I think the cartoonist is trying to cover all his options.'

"According to my calculations, the world's water level will not rise due to global warming!"

"Billy's cheating, Susan is lying, Dave, no, that's Gary, no, Bob. Bob's stealing?"

"The eyes are the last part of the body to die. The pupils dilate."

Guy in Opthamology Store Room getting Evil Eyeballs.