Eye Care Gifts

'You say you're having trouble seeing into the future'

'When you said this was an eye examination for Macular Degeneration, I didn't think you meant an actual exam!'

"Your new spectacles will cost...."

'Ha ha... Very funny!'

'The smallest line I can read says 'Made In China'.'

'Wait! Wait a minute! Would you hold my glasses?'

'Having trouble getting used to your new bi-focals'

'Well you're an eye doctor aren't you'

'Have you ever thought of trying contact lenses?'

'That's still blurry This might be a good time to show you your bill.'

'One letter at a time.'

'Yes I can imagine it was frightening when you began seeing double.'

'They give you that 'I'm tough but thoughtful' look'

"I just got these new glasses from my ophthalmologist – they come with tiny windshield wipers to clean the fog from my mask!"

"You really need bifocals. Then you can read the fine print and see the big picture, too."

"Wrong, wrong, wrong and wrong. I'd like you to see another specialist. His office is closer to the eye chart."

"I think I see why the eyedrops aren't working."

'You haven't been eating your carrots, have you?'

"Over here."

'No you can't take a copy home to prepare for your eye exam next week'

'You really need to think about getting glasses.'

'You say you're having trouble seeing the future.'

'Now cover the other eye & read the same line.'

'I told you not to wear your new contacts for more than 12 hours a day.'

'How do you like those?' - 'Great, I can see the same pair across the road for £5 less.'

"I'm detecting a slight twinkle."

Senior tennis player having a tennis-oriented vision check-up.

"I see so much better after cataract surgery and....wow, you're bald!"

'My wife tells me I need glasses but as usual she is wrong'

'New glasses often hurt at first Tom.'

'Yes I can imagine it was frightening when you began seeing double.'

'He doesn't like to be called an Optometrist. He prefers the title 'Visionary'!'

'No thanks, just squinting.'

"Billy's cheating, Susan is lying, Dave, no, that's Gary, no, Bob. Bob's stealing?"

'They're the latest tri-focals. You can see close, far, and behind your back.'