Extraterrestrials Pillows

"Take us to your vodka."

Captain Pointy No.5 - Skeptical about aliens

'I said, 'take us to your leader', that's whoo!'

'IQ shortage, help wanted.'

'...and what about my Human Rights?'

'Anyway, thanks for listening to me...'

Alien on Board

An alien bachelor party,

Alien babies run round the streets while everyone ignores them.

'...I know it's hard, but try keeping all your eyes on the ball.'

'We've been picking up your TV broadcasts- are you people nuts or what?'

Humans welcome a UFO and its aliens whilst other aliens get ready with guns in the background

I wonder what kind of a welcome we will get on this planet.

'Wallow in perfect circles. It drives them crazy.'

Crashed saucer, man running, vanity license plate reads 'AXDNTLAW'

'...Water on Mars'

"Bringing him a television from the 1960's has turned him into a cro-magnon rock potato!"

"According to your report he didn't take the probing very well."

Alien implants

"And may I ask where you've been? I've been texting you all night!"

"The aliens that control my brain really want me to get this job."

Hand Sanitiser

"What's 'ET' short for. . . ?"

"But your profile said you were the hottest guy on the planet."

"My report on UFOs went nowhere."

"No dessert until you finish your dark matter."

"Funny how this happens when we're supposed to have dinner with my friends."

"We're a highly advanced race. Except for the mullets."

"Those are the sickos that made a film of Zorg's autopsy!"

"No threat detected. Their vast resources are spent on lasers that combat wrinkles and unwanted hair."

"Sometimes they readjust when we release them, sometimes they don't."

Tourist aliens - "You want the Pyramids. I want Bermuda. I'm driving. I win."

'It says here on your application that you were fired from your receptionist position for refusing to answer phones...well, thanks for applying! Bye now!'

'We've been picking up your radio broadcasts- You must be Fibber McGee and Molly'

'You look a bit 'off colour'... you'd better go home early, Smithers!'