Extinction Irony Seeker Pillows

"They say the Transformation Meteor is coming, but I told them "I'm a dinosaur. I don't do change" What's the worst that could happen?"

Men looking at black screen, "I call it film noir"

'I feel like exercising. Have you seen my tennis shoes?'

'Hello Colin, I'm Arthur, any idea what all the fuss is about?'

'Now, think hard about it: Do you want to be known as the one who ate the last Dodo?'

Artisan hot dog stand has pigs tethered to it.

"My service animal for Alzheimer's, sonny!"

"Most women find me too cutthroat."

'I'd hire you, but the word is going around you guys are practically extinct!'

"Wait, wait, back up, back up. Who the #!@! is George Orwell?"

"Barry stop!. . . I'm you! I'm Barry from 2008. I'm using a time machine to stop you from making an awful mistake!"

The Red Carpet

'My horoscope said I would be taking a long trip today.'

"The average citizen doesn't have a clue - or why would we keep getting re-elected?"

Eurydice in prison

"They say it's the last of the really big cattle drives, and I'm just glad I'm here to see it."

"Frankly, I don't like the way things are going."

'A late payment and a friendly reminder cross paths in the mail.'

'We need to panic until common sense returns.'

"I always said I'd sleep when I'm dead, and yet here I am doing paperwork."

"Beware of dog"

Lost and found - 'Can you desribe it?' (Queen being asked having lost her crown).

Local anaesthetic.

'I thought my people were happy, I know I was.

"Don't even start, Claire. You knew I was a snake when you took me in."

"They found culturally insensitive products in my kitchen."

'I see we'll be sampling the wines of New Jersey this evening.'

...I'm here at the gruesome scene now. Yes, what began as a candlelight vigil,ended in mass tragedy when the thousands of moths in attendance became inexplicably drawn to each other's flames.

'I get to work early and all I get are the worms.'

Greeting Card Shop: No Rhyme or Reason Cards.

"It's from our tax consultant. We forgot to beef up our pension scheme, so now we're going to be extinct."

"I've half a mind to protest."