Experiment Extraodinaire Gifts

Science Lab. I have to work late, dear --- I spent most of the day going the wrong way.

"Ya know, 'DUH' can be a very hurtful word."

"This is a lovely old song that tells of a young woman who leaves her cottage, and goes off to work. She arrives at her destination, and places some solid NHHS in a flask containing 0.50 atm ofammonia, and attempts to determine the pressures of ammonia and hydrogen sulide when equilibrium is reached."

"Young Frankenstein"

"My older self travels back just to remind me to put the cap back on this pen?"

'I pledge allegiance to the atom, and to the periodic table on which it stands, many particles indivisible, with orbitals and electrons for all.'

Uncle demonstrating chemical experiments to children

'Mom, Dad! Look what I created in lab today!'

"I'm starting him off with a little rope theory."

'Tastes like cherry kool-aid, what's it do?'

"You have to believe what you're doing will lead to something valuable, even though it probably won't."

Jr. cloning kit

"We have to take that science away from Tommy...he's genetically modified the cat!"

Yound Einstein disproves an early theory: 'Aha! A watched pot DOES boil!'

"What's your project for the science fair, Arnold?"

Atomic Bear: Part 21

Small child building a large contraption from junk

"I thought you wanted me to change."

'My science project is an experiment in static electricity.'

Armstrong? Why did UPS just deliver a microscope, a robotic arm, a huge incubator, a nucleus extractor and a dozen lab rats? Well, it's certainly not so I can replace you with an army of clones programmed to work for free. Well

'Note to self: Like coffee, homemade coffee wine should be available in decaf, too.'

"But until I do transmute lead into gold, maybe I could interest you in some lovely lead jewelry."

"It's just one monkey at one typewriter, but we've given him an infinite need for validation."

'Kids, today, Xerf brought in a planet that he found. Now if we look at it closely under the microscope, you can still see it's inhabitants scrambling around.'

'Well, I guess we're the control group.'

'You did help Junior with his science project.'

"Boss is coming! Discover something!"

"Yeah, the Jekyll and Hyde thing is weird, but if I play it right, I get fed twice."

Science Fair Judgements

No caption (A crash test dummy in the shape of a bird flies toward a window. Other birds dressed as scientists study the experiment from the ground).

"My first night in the lab and I was clearly the smallest brain in the place."

I drive, therefore I am.

'I may not know about DNA, but I sure as hell know about recombinant.'

'There are two types of alchemy - there's organic and there's inorganic.'

'I told you, you were missing a decimal point.'