Experiencing Midlife Reflection Pillows

Realizing that his youth was now behind him, Mr. Twigly left home at the sight of his first gray hare.

A man sprays his bald head with "Spray Hair" to make it seem as thought he has hair.

'See? You call my look 'a midlife crisis' but for these guys it's a major TV series.'

Corporate departments as a metaphor for growing up.

"Follow that dream!" (man boarding taxi)

"This car is very fast and very expensive. Just how bad is your midlife crisis?"

'Take a good look, Junior. When I was your age, I was 'Fun Size,' too.'

The summer of her 39th year, Eleanor could be found most evenings on a hill (known locally as Robert's Hump) doing aerobics of her own devising.

'Where Are They Now?'

"You used to be that ambitious."

"I'm 59 and they say I'm middle aged. Just how many people do you know who are 118?"

We micro-grafted all the hairs from the back of your head to the top and now we've completely covered your bald spot.'

'I've used up all my eligibilities'

'Push'n 50, but ya still got it!!'

'Here's your chance to become a legend.'

"I'm thinking about letting myself get old."

'Let's face it George: we're not spring chickens anymore...'

"Mirror, mirror, on the wall, go to hell."

Midlife: You Are Here.

"Wasn't I lovely then eh, Tiddles?"

'Is that all you can do Just sitting there watching your old movies'

Getting older is...making noises whenever you bend down or get back up.

This is what Fred gets for wishing for more hair.

"Remember back when we were just larva and didn't have a care in the world?"

"Remember the days we could drink and party all night and we thought guys in their 50's were old geezers?"

"It seems like only yesterday I was on the verge of getting it all together."

'Brother, the Lord takes a very dim view of the comb-over.'

"You should do something brilliant, before it's too late."

"Still getting those hot flashes, Margaret?"

They all thought they'd be astronauts...instead they're all accountants.

Phil at Fifty: Still Trying to Find Himself

"My salad days have all turned to coleslaw..."

'Since we've been married thirty years, Lester, I think it's time to face up to the fact that we've been seeing too much of each other.'