Exotic Decor Collector Gifts

"We had these twigs flown in from Italy."

All bets are off as Round One begins in the "Dollars versus Donuts" World Championship title fight.

Emergency Hipster Beard

'Oh, I don't have a problem, doc. My friend here has a problem.'

'I don't think I've ever heard of the Geezer Scouts or Geezer Scout cookies.'

"Any duck that thinks that decoy looks like a duck,swims like a duck and sounds like a duck, deserves to be shot!"

"I get that you're cold, but does he also have to eat all our meals with us?"

'Not till you're sixteen.'

Pre-Bay

"This is Norman's little bureau of alcohol, tobacco, and firearms."

Wallpaper Bouguet

Alien with flying spaceships on wall instead of flying ducks

"Interestingly no - these are vastly enlarged images of my three favourite chromosomes."

'Let's face it, we're not meant to wear hats...'

'He was just the same with my frankincense - more interested in the box!'

Swiss Army General.

Own a piece of history - floodwaters

"Ok, Monica, here's where it gets weird."

'...However Algae production is still in its infancy...'

Grim Swatter

"Look! They have a Quinceanera Carlie doll! How authentic!"

Antique Scrimshaw: We floss daily.

The Job Interview

Warning: Surrealism next 4 miles (surrealistic art)

'I realized there was no store in the neighborhood where you could biy a book and you could also buy a pot.'

Mugshots

"What have I told you about accepting suits from strangers?"

'That's a tea tray.'

An Energetic Susan.