Existence Questioner T-Shirts

"I'm starting to prefer the ones who don't believe in me."

"My feeling is that while we should have the deepest respect for reality, we should not let it control our lives."

Berkeley Webcams

'I don't think therefore I'm not.'

I've been teaching art history for decades. Students today ask new kinds of questions. No, I doubt a gluten-free menu option was available that evening. Nope, the artist was not making a statement about climate change. No, despite the umbrellas, this is not about sun exposure safety. Well, yes, I suppose you can say it's a selfie.

'Hey! Contemplate your own navel!'

"I shop, therefore I am."

"...I don't believe in the past or the future. I don't even believe in right now. Everyone remembers the past differently. Everyone imagines the future differently. Everyone even disagrees about what's happening right now. So who's to say tomorrow what you and I did tonight?"

"Mrs. Marsha Mullhouse, of Kenosha, Wisconsin, asks, "Are You subject to the laws of physics, or are the laws of physics subject to You?"

"But what if this is all there is?"

"Daddy, why do people pull round pizza from square boxes and cut them into triangles before they eat them?"

"So have you ever stopped to ask yourself: If he really knew the secrets of the universe, would he be living in a damn cave?"

'If it 'tells' the time, why do I have to look at it?'

"When will I be old enough to have an inner child?"

Ostrich Curoisities

"You say we atheists are going to Hell? Look at all the f**ks we give... Go ahead... Look at them all."

"After spending thirty years creating models of early universe formation, I began to suspect that my work didn't make a shred of difference."

'But why do you want to transmute asparagus into cotton?'

Lost and Profound.

'Is there a God? God knows...'

What's the antidote for wheat germ?

"This is a little embarrassing to admit, but everything that happens happens for no real reason."

"What's the new manager going to do? Bite your head off."

'I don't know - asceticism just doesn't seem like ENOUGH any more,'

If a tree falls on a philosopher in the woods, and no one is there to hear his screams for help, did he really make a sound?

Are You a True American Patriot?

"Yes, but can your philosophical speculations on existence also be relative to why I crossed the road?"

"I have a movie plot idea... A girl is kidnapped at birth. She's threatened, oppressed, and lives in constant fear. Here's the twist - the kidnapper is only in her mind."

'I blog, therefore I am.'

"And lo, we made God in our own image.."

"What can you tell me about the meaning of death?"

"What's it all about?"

'Dad, tell me again what life's about.'

Religion, This End Up

'If we have everlasting life, what about entropy?'