Exhibition Visits Gifts

Art Gallery View.

'Hurry, wipe it off before Dad comes home!'

At the Museum

"I think that's one of his early 'blank canvases'. I think there are some bigger ones in the next room."

Paul Klee

'The way the eyes follow you is uncanny.'

Party Animals.

"What the %@!!* is that?!" "Is that a leg? Wait—no, it's an arm. Wait—what?" "The frame is nice." "Whatever it is, it makes me miss Bob Ross." "Gasp!" "The intentionally lost Caravaggio"

"Personally, I'm a doer."

"Is it me, or is Jasper Johns a genius?" "Über-genius, Larry. Über!"

'Are you sure this is authentic ancient Indian art?'

Well, you know these child prodigies - they can be very demanding about how their work is displayed.

"His mother had a great influence on him. She always made him eat his fruits and vegetables."

Nothing like traveling hundreds of miles to immerse yourself in art for the sole purpose of killing time between meals.

Couple Sitting in Front of A Sunset.

'No, Timmy, we are not supposed to connect them.'

'I can make out the nude, but I don't see the submarine.'

Cats at private view

Children's Art Show.

"No - you’re right. It’s dumb."

Jackson Pollock: abstract; Picasso: cubism; Bobby: eight year old

Castle, Cafe + Gift Shop.

The Rise of Modern Art

Dynasties - Ping, Ching, Ming.

Trade Show Sherpas

"Swiping won't cut it sonny-boy, you have to physically walk to the next painting."

'Number two. That's the art that offended me.'

A sign that reads "ART...and plenty of it!" hangs above the entrance to a museum.

'Wow, talk about genius!'

Freaks of nature exhibit.

Raphael

"Then what happened?"

'We unfortunately had to compress our dinosaur area due to budget cuts. On the bright side, TyrannoTriStegoApatoHadroPlesioSaurodon Rex here is now the museum's most popular exhibit.'

Piles of trash discarded by ancient people are a rich source of artifacts for archaeologists. I unearthed garbage dumps that advanced our understanding of prehistoric societies. On the island of Crete I found ancient trash that increased our knowledge about the Minoan people. And I recently uncovered informative Celtic rubbish. Please stop saying studying ancient cultures by what they threw away is "junk science"!

Baby vandalizes an art gallery.