Exercise Promoter Gifts

"That's great, but you still have to walk more."

'Try and be negative in a positive way.'

'Twenty years ago I began jogging five miles a day - could you tell me where I am?'

"What do you mean 'sitting is the new smoking'? I thought fat was the new smoking?"

'Of course I stretched first. That's how I hurt myself.'

'My diet seems to be working great! Do you have any less relaxed jeans?'

Man posing on beach as women ignore him.

"Things are looking up!"

Cheer up-things aren't so bad.....

"Hold on, hun... I'm just saying, losing four ounces in a month is better than gaining four ounces in a month!"

Always remember...you're the best you in the world.

Attitudes are contagious. Is yours worth catching?

How Optimism Works

He tried to be positive, no matter the atmosphere.

Life is like a tube of toothpaste

'Ere-we distinctly asked for SAM an' Ella!'

"So has this obsession about your weight ever led to thoughts of suicide?"

Try not to worry.

"Exercise is a great way of losing weight."

'Some of you may have heard that Dr. Weil is giving HIS talk right now in the next auditorium.'

'Seize another day... This one is mine.'

Employment Dept. Fill Out Job Applications Here. This application form has too much space for "work experience" and not enough for "leisure activities."

"On a scale of one to ten. How happy would you say you are?"

Glass Half Empty and Glass Half Full.

No negative attitude anytime.

'Go on, I dare you. Put it on the boss's door!'

'Oh I retired a few months back...I'm a promoter now.'

"I just saw myself in the mirror naked and I look like hell. How about a nice compliment to lift my spirits."

'Usherettes and razzamatazz won't bring back the crowds - we need some new lions'.

The Supreme Court and the March of Progress

'Lose weight or you're through as a western star!'

Fat Britain

Always look on the bright side.

'I'm no good at push ups.'

"So much for that publicity stunt."