Execution Lore Keeper Pillows

'Oh, quit whimpering! -- Anybody would think that you're the only king in the world who every got his head chopped off!'

"I guess it's ethical. Let me run it through my 'Ethics Check' app."

"I'm going to talk about the summer before last, it was much more fun."

"Those are the names of your children? I went a different route...I memorized my kids' names."

Billy would watch his ant farm for hours on end.

Dear Diary. . . why, oh why, did I choose an adventure holiday?

"Ours is not a creative clan."

"10th Anniversary Woodstock Reunion'

Shoulda, Woulda, Coulda

'Plimbco Bank &Trust, Old Money Division.'

Michael Jackson

'How do we SLEEP at night?'

"Someday, Sweetheart, you’ll look back on this day and think to yourself, ‘Covid ruined my college experience.’"

Fenton G. Gonklemeyer, Computer Scientist - Booted Up 1928 and Crashed 2009.

It is a lesser known historical fact that Sir Edmund Hillary was also the first person to climb Mount Everest and forget to take the lens cap off.

"Why mum, I didn't know that you had written a book."

'Minyan Man! You've saved the day again!'

"I remember that game of Spin-the-Bottle like it was yesterday. It was love at firstspin."

'That's a picture of my granddad with shoulder length hair and a beard. That's why mom calls these albums hair looms.'

"The Chinese Zodiac told me to marry a sheep. Who am I to question hundreds of years of ancient Chinese wisdom?"

Loch Ness Beer Monster

'Never trust emails. You can't shred them.'

"When I was young, we personally prepared all the food for each and every meal!"

"I think I'll keep a diary..."

"The new computer is great, but we can't get rid of the old one. It knows too much."

"It was a mom-and-pop, but we inherited it."

"They lead a simple life - they don't even put gas in their cars."

'You're always living in the past.'

Mr. Briggs' Adventures in the Highlands, part 11.

'Make him laugh, make him cry.'

"I put my faith in coal. Because there’s no fuel like an old fuel."

Man reads note, which reads: Have been diagnosed with Alzheimer's disease, I don't know where your dinner is.

'At least they can't touch the village local' say two country gents. The pub now has a sign on the window saying 'This is now a smoke free pub, also no dogs or horsey types!'

"I've had. . . um. . . just a small sherry. . ."

A rare picture of Henry VIII's divorce lawyer.