Exclusive Club Enthusiasts Gifts

Garrick club. Men's men only.

"Welcome to the club. Not my club, mind you - you couldn't afford that."

La Table

Dancing at the Clubs.

"The club scene is really changing."

Meeting at the Grumpy Old Men's Pub.

Rooster DJ scratches records during party.

"It's been so long—it's like I'm only gay in theory."

'When you said we were going clubbing, I didn't know you meant History Club, Chess Club and Math Club.'

'You're talking three million, ballpark

Time-of-the-month club.

"One more thing...don't upset the bouncer!"

De Luxe Model - Cupholders.

'Over on stage number two is the lovely, succulent, Misty Flatulence!'

Hap's Bar & Grill: 'Stress manager on duty.'

Elephant Upgrade

'The jacuzzi, the workshop and the wine cellar is standard, but the swimming pool, the grill patio and the media room is optional!'. (Selling an oversize SUV).

'If you couldn't get into clubs, what makes you think you can get in here?'

'He's here to apply for the bouncer job.'

I use to file your expenses at the office Mr. Henderson, but I never dreamed I'd be one of them.

"Welcome to our private banking group."

'Ok Fellas let's see some I.D.'

Nerd night at the club.

'Watch out -she goes for anything in trousers.'

Three juniors want to join our eco club. Good recruiting! No way I'm letting them in! What?! Be we need new members! Not necessarily! Gore lies. Global warming is hot air! I (heart) fur.

Members only.

Dance Enthusiasts.

My latest invention is genius. It's an affinity card for our best customers. That's not a new idea. Airlines, rental car agencies, hotels … They all have loyalty programs where you can earn discounts and special treatment. Spare me. Ours has a way better name: The Cafe Exclusive VIP Premier Executive Best Customer Reward Program. And we don't trouble customers with confusing discounts and benefits. All hail the VIP premier cheapskate.

"Maybe we'd be more fun if we were loaded."

Cat attending mouse nightclub.

This club is for members only

JOIN THE BOY SCOUTS HERE!, ''Trustworthy, friendly, loyal, helpful, kind, courteous, brave, thrifty, obedient and cheerful' -- This is going to look GREAT on my resume!'

I shall now unveil my first great experiment in exploitative capitalism. Oh joy. Institute for Capitalist Exploitation. Beneath this sheet is an extraordinary creation. I give you … The new cafe exclusive VIP premier executive best customer reward card. Available to anyone who pays $9.95 a month for membership. Fine print: Includes no benefits.

The first rule of Mime Club is: You don't talk about Mime Club.

"First, please take your resume out of its 24 carat gold picture frame."