Everyday Psychologist Pillows

Bloody pedestrians! Get out of the way! Don't you beep at me, arrogant drivers!

"The dryer giveth and the dryer taketh away."

"The way he stacks those blocks, I see repression, some hostility, and a lot of dissatisfaction with his place in society."

"Actually, the district office is getting better results with a fresh garlic bagel."

Freudian Bar & Grill...Jungian Pub: 'We can out drink those Freudians ant day of the week!...'And twice on Sunday!' ...'Yeah!' ... e

"One side is for depression, the other is for anxiety, and if you're still confused make an appointment with the cat."

'I'm down to a pack of neuroses a day.'

"Go ask your mother ... and I'll tell you why she's wrong."

"Siri, are Charlie’s parents to blame for his neurosis?"

'Next time you hear confession from that barmaid say, Tut-tut not COR.'

"You have arrived at your destination."

Post Game Day Betting.

"I took the road less travelled just to avoid the potholes."

'It's been a rough day, my shirt button fell off, the handle of my brief case came off... I'm too scared to go to the bathroom!'

"Sure I can't pop that in a bag for you, sir?"

"I've figured out why my life is boring."

'I know Jesus spoke in parables. Now for the last time, tell me exactly where you put my car keys.'

"Thanks Mum, but I prefer to use twitter to enlarge the microcosms of daily life."

How long have you been delusional?

"Don't worry, it's nothing."

"And how do you feel when your patient does online research and thinks he's an expert?"

'The Human Comedy needs a laugh track.'

'You deserve one another, but I don't deserve you!'

"Is this a good time to bring up a car problem?"

The Jerck Manual

'I don't know how you stand listening to people's problems all of the time, Doctor Barnes.'

"There are several words I could use to describe your condition, but I'm leaning towards whiney."

Modern Charm

A therapist hides behind sandbags as a general talks of war.

How to injury yourself as an adult

'The way I got it doped out, post-modern man is all context and fragment.'

'Could I have a loan a cup of sugar please?'

I don't see a future for me in my present job. They don't reward mediocrity.