Events Director Pillows

"You've been promoted to Internal Company Festival Events Director, in other words organizing the Christmas party."

"You've got to fill in these forms to join the 'How to reduce bureaucracy' seminar."

"You're losing the audience. Switch to the Powerpoint presentation."

Face painting.

"You may now kiss the bride..."

"Oh, no - Karen baked a cake so dense that not even light can escape."

"Thanks to my wedding planner, everyone in the wedding is still talking to each other."

"As this is a civil ceremony, I'd rather you took the vows without swearing."

Buisnessman Of The Hour - I'd like to introduce our guest but he is 45 minutes late

Face painting by numbers.

Man at penthouse party walks out onto terrace and is startled to see the Earth, instead of the moon, shining in the sky.

"Please hold applause until end of dragon."

'Why don't you leave the planning of our wedding to me?'

"Dare I ask for mustard?"

'Hey, hey, hey!'

"Tia Carmen, if you had a bucket list, what would you put in it?"

“Look! We’re on the naked cam!”

'He was hosting a business dinner for 300. Those were his last words.'

Who are the most important people at the World Cup?

Extra Long-jump

'I'll try to keep my remarks brief.'

"The sound system is fixed so we can start. Would you kindly put the beach ball away!"

Please Do Not Throw Cups of Beer At The Players... It's A Waste of Beer.'

Wisely, many wedding planners are hiring refs to monitor the bouquet toss.

The Aisle

"Don Wood? I don't know any Don Wood!"

... And by the end of the first quarter of the game, the famous 'Man Cave' was completely deserted.

'...Just because you hired me doesn't mean I have to entertain.'

"We'll make your wedding reception perfect, and don't forget you get a money-saving coupon for any future divorce parties."

"Look! It's the Montgomerys from the breast-cancer walk."

"I seem to have forgotten what I was going to say...please...hold the applause!"

"Afterward, there will be a short Q. and A. that will be just long enough for one person to take up too much of it."

'What's the chance of getting a latte around here?'

Eurocopa 2016

"Excuse me, sorry, is anyone using this chair?"