Evening Show Enthusiast Gifts

"Have you tried binge-watching a show together?"

'I'd explain how the TV, VCR, DVD, surround sound home entertainment system works...but I don't know.'

Job Vacancy: Human cannonball. Applicants must of the right calibre

Benihana style of cooking.

'Come quick: Rin Tin Tin is on TV again...'

'Would you like you steak WITH or WITHOUT a capella?'

"Swiping won't cut it sonny-boy, you have to physically walk to the next painting."

"Spoiler alert! I'm about to tell you the part that really bugged me about 'Wolverine.'" "You don't have to say 'spoiler alert,' minion. It's been a month." "Anyone who hasn't seen it yet has not fulfilled their role as a dutiful consumer, and deserves whatever spoilage they will receive." "In fact, let me know who they are and I'll enter them into my database. When the corporatist revolution comes, there will be consequences." "Um... never mind."

Showing off the good china 3-7 pm.

"I've had these glasses since I was a kid, when my doctor told me I'd grow into them..."

"We can stop entertaining ourselves now, Ian."

'Looks like everyone has FINALLY gone home.'

Frank's bar & grill & jukebox & pool table & chairs & bathroom & mechanical bull & tables & karaoke machine & drinking fountain & lamps & fire extinguisher & doors & floors...

'It's nice, but I wish we could get more than one channel.'

Bedtime story.

Lady throws dart to decide which soap opera she's going to watch.

How I met your mother

'Yeah, my phone folds out into a TV tray.'

"I'm so looking forward to the weekend, there's a show on: We're going to be pampered and they'll put lovely ribbons in our manes..."

"We can deliver it Tuesday. If no one's home, we'll just slip it under the door."

More Arts Council cuts...

"As I recall, Leonard, when we first watched 'The Honeymooners' you said that it marked the decline and fall of Western culture."

"I much prefer the evening milking to the morning one: The farmer is not a "morning person", now is he?"

"In this business the ball takes funny bounces. I got you a recording contract."

'Why do you always have to make a spectacle of yourself.'

"I LOVE this business! Just when you think you've discovered our culture's lowest common denominator, along comes a crazy genius like you to show us how wrong our math was!"

'Crikey, you've got to have good eye-sight to look through those glasses, haven't you?'

"It's only insomnia if there's nothing good on."

"Wait! It gets even crazier!"