Ethical Shopping Enthusiast Pillows

"How are the human rights on these?"

'Knibbles Dog Food - this product is cruelty-free. It has not been tested on dogs.'

"Good For You / Bad For You"

Nature versus commerce.

But is it organic?

"Most of these pelts were suicides."

"Wild-caught, farm-raised, lab-grown, beach-found, or aquarium-harvested."

Organic Produce: No Pesticides, Herbicides or Bad Vibes.

See you at the farmers market!

"They've got me doing cosmetics research."

Price may vary with weather.

"I love finding my food at the Farmers Market. Makes me feel like a true pioneer."

Supermarket Aisles: 'Good for the Environment' and 'Couldn't give a flying F@$#! about the environment!'

Modern Witch Shoppe

'Great, and I'll also need some mirrors.'

Consumption Graph.

'I'm not authorized to talk about that...I'll have to patch you through to our department of unspeakable evil.'

ONE MORNING WHILE GETTING DRESSED,

are you so alienated from any real form of community that you can no longer distinguish between belonging and conforming?

Pets: This animal has not been tested on products.

"Do you carry any shampoos that have been tested on little kittens?"

'Could you tell me where the organic locally-grown vine-ripened union-picked kiwis are?'

'Yes, the wood on this pencil is from a renewable source.'

It all began with free-range chicken. Then it was organic vegetables. Next the farmers decided they should all take a year off to go find themselves.

Shop assistant hands over 'eco' shopping bag, saying: 'Would you like a bag for that?'

"And getting rarer by the day, madam!"

"Oh get over it. It's crocodile. We're alligators."

CEO slumber

Tips for a green Christmas by Indian Wild Animals.

"It's the closest I get to being a hunter-gatherer."

'Do you sell eggs? . . . I forgot to say that I have middle class guilt. . .'

How can I ensure I'm getting 100 orange juice? Buy an orange!

'We have a new line of eco-friendly shoes. They're designed to reduce your global footprint!'

"Nothing that's overfished, poached or farmed? How about some seaweed?"

Second hand store: 'LEFTOVERS AGAIN!'